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Dispatch 13 JUL 2026 Satire

NZ 'Not Fazed' by China's Objections to Defence Pact It Hasn't Costed Yet

Foreign Minister Winston Peters has confirmed New Zealand is in exploratory talks with Australia and Fiji about joining a Pacific defence alliance, and says the country should not be fazed by any objection China might raise. This is a bold position to hold before anyone has worked out what the alliance would actually cost. The Government describes the talks as exploratory. Exploratory, in this context, appears to mean the confidence has arrived well ahead of the arithmetic.

Massey University’s Dr Anna Powles has pointed out that New Zealand would need genuine capability and resources to defend the alliance’s other members if it signs on, since the pact reportedly commits members to “act to meet common danger”. That is a significant sentence to agree to without a costed plan attached. The Government’s public posture, meanwhile, remains fixed on not being fazed by China, a stance that requires no budget line at all.

Being unfazed is free. Meeting a common danger is not, and nobody at the Beehive has yet put a number on what “common danger” might require of a country with New Zealand’s defence budget. The exploratory talks continue. So, presumably, does the exploring, right up until somebody is asked to explore their way to an actual figure.